Here's an idea. Why don't you replace your current leader? I know a bloke with a proven track record of missteps, gaffes and blunders who'd be perfect for the job. Ladies and gentlemen, I present ... Angus Taylor.
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What could possibly go wrong?
The air was thick with TV analogies yesterday. From frustrated Liberal moderate Andrew Bragg came the warning to his own side that it risked being compared to an episode of Days of our Lives if it persisted talking about its internal dramas. The PM likened the opposition's bizarre behaviour to Married At First Sight.
"You know they're going to end badly," he told the Labor caucus. "You know there's going to be cheating involved, and they're going to be not truthful to each other."
From where I sit, it's more comedy gold than soapie or reality TV. Especially if Taylor gets the leader's gig, a prospect more likely now Andrew Hastie has removed himself from contention.
When it comes to pass - few are saying "if" any longer - the government will be chuffed. Since coming to office in 2022, it has relished every moment Taylor has risen to his feet in question time.
"The gift that keeps giving," Treasurer Jim Chalmers quipped in 2023 when Taylor muddled a question about the budget. It's hard to keep a straight face, Chalmers told the chamber, wearing a smile so bright it was reflected in the glasses of those sitting opposite. He then demolished the premise of Taylor's question.
Throughout the last term of Parliament, Chalmers ran rings around the then shadow treasurer. Every question asked would be met with ridicule, Taylor returning to his seat, shaking his head in frustration and looking as if comprehension was just beyond his grasp.
Taylor also ran rings around himself, even prompting the Coalition-friendly Sky News to list a "litany" of Taylor's errors on the floor of the House: the price of Vegemite rising by 8 per cent in month, which it hadn't; confusing monthly inflation with the annual rate; asserting half of Australia's mortgage holders were about to go from fixed to variable interest rates when they weren't: and saying he'd always supported the government's energy bill relief when he'd previously stood up calling it the worst legislation ever.
Even in government Taylor made spectacular errors. There was the smear job on Sydney's Lord Mayor Clover Moore, using bogus statistics, which prompted a police investigation. Oh, and don't forget the time he posted "Well done, Angus" on his own Facebook page.
You couldn't ask for a better leader of the parliamentary Liberal Party. If you were the Labor government, that is. We've seen less of Taylor this term. As shadow defence minister, there have been fewer opportunities to put his foot in his mouth. But as Liberal leader, he'd have to be first on his feet, to the delight of Labor.
All well and good if you enjoy easy laughs with your question time. If you believe the business of parliament should be more than comedy and canned laughter from the government benches, perhaps Taylor isn't such a good idea.
HAVE YOUR SAY: Would Angus Taylor make a better leader of the Liberals than Sussan Ley? Given his poor parliamentary performance would Taylor as leader be the gift that keeps on giving? Email us: echidna@theechidna.com.au
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IN CASE YOU MISSED IT:
- David Littleproud will remain the leader of the Nationals Party after a failed spill motion.
- Major parties and special interest groups splashed out hundreds of millions of dollars on political parties and the federal election. The biggest third-party spender was Clive Palmer's Mineralogy, which pumped almost $53 million into May's election.
- Weeks of infighting have taken a toll on the former Coalition partners as Pauline Hanson's One Nation soars to new heights of popularity.
THEY SAID IT: "Failure is not a single, cataclysmic event. You don't fail overnight. Instead, failure is a few errors in judgment, repeated every day." - Jim Rohn, American motivational author
YOU SAID IT: The surrender of Russian troops to a robot is a glimpse into the future of warfare.
"Not only with autonomous robots but Ukraine's reliance on drones or UAVs has completely changed modern warfare with devastating results," writes Phillip. "In December alone it was reported that 32,000 Russians were killed. It would be easy do dismiss these figures as propaganda, but each drone has a video record of its mission which is verified. Even scarier, Ukraine is treating drone warfare as a morbid video game. Drone units are given bonus points for each Russian soldier killed which they can convert into 'prizes' of more drones and equipment. Welcome to the new world war."
Arthur writes: "All will be well with AI robots as soldiers until the robots learn to reproduce themselves. Once the robots learn to reproduce themselves like the Daleks in Dr Who the robots will attack us and try to take over the world. We have been warned."
"Early warfare necessitated personal, blow-by-blow confrontation," writes Maggie. "Guns and bullets allowed killing at a distance, but still required selection of a personal target. Dropping bombs from an aircraft took the killer one step further away, with no immediate visual evidence of the effect. Long-range missiles and then drones further removed the swing of a sword from the press of a button. UGVs are another step away from looking the enemy in the eye. The parallel development is the impersonalisation of the foe. No chance of a Christmas Truce between UGVs. And still, one has to admire the Ukrainian people for doing what they have with what they've got."
Alan from Ulladulla writes: "AI in all manner of applications already scares me. How long before our police forces rely on it for law enforcement?"
"There are questions raised about the ethics of mechanised and robot warfare," writes Murray. "It's a waste of breath. War is not ethical. War is about using the amount of force required to defeat your enemy. It always has been. That ultimate piece of kit, the aircraft carrier, changes wars simply by turning up. No one complains about that. Well, apart from the side staring at it."

